On the way home one evening, I came across three joggers- A guy and two ladies. The guy and one of the ladies were running side by side, and the other lady was trailing behind them. A couple and a third wheel, if that wasn’t too obvious. It’s been a while since I’ve seen joggers in our subdivision, jogging at night. These guys must be really motivated. What can I say? It’s the first week of January.
Nah, I’m kidding. C’mon, we all have that joke about January, don’t we? At least they’re trying. How long would they last? Would this become their lifestyle? Or just another January hype? Judgmental? Oh, shut up. You’re laughing. I wonder who’d be the first to show signs of laziness and giving up in the upcoming days, weeks, or months, considering they’d last that long. Is it the guy? His girlfriend? Or the ever so loyal third wheel, who’s with them all the way?
Probably the third wheel, huh? I mean, why would I tire myself out just for a pretending-to-be active couple just because they needed extra company, yet they just keep me behind them while they go all coochy-coochy-coo with each other? If I was her, I’d give this couple a slap in their butts, run past them and go, “Stay fat, you ugly couple! 2020 is my year!” and then just sprint away. See if they could catch up. Nobody does it like me!
Or maybe it’s gonna be either one of the couple who’d give up. “Honey, I already have you and I know you adore me as much as a baby adores ice cream. We don’t need to do this, do we?” Have you ever stumbled upon this article shared on Facebook that says a couple gets fat when they’re happy? Yeah, it’s because of that lame-ass excuse they give each other when they finally realized what a fool they are for even attempting to become better.
But there’s a bigger reason the third wheel won’t ever give up- she’s running after her dream. Not a fit and healthy body, but the man of her dreams, the guy that’s been in front of her all along. The one she’d always been running after ever since they’d met but had to do it in the shadows, the one who couldn’t get beside him and tell him how she really feels because she knows he’s already taken, and he’s happy. So she always lags behind him and his lover on purpose because she knows that that’s the closest she’s ever gonna get. Now she has to literally run after him because he asked her to run with them, and she would never refuse a request from her dream guy.
Call it a selfish and foolish thing to do, but this third wheel chooses to stay behind her dream, the guy, and would continue to trail behind him, run after him. Even when she starts to run out of breath, she won’t ever try to stop and let him go, or run closer to him and reach for him. She’d just stay behind them both. Even if she knows that she’s much stronger and could run much faster than the couple, this third wheel chooses to stay behind them and be their shadow.
His lover suddenly sprints away, not looking back and never comes back, leaving him with a clueless look on his face. The third wheel, being only two steps behind him, easily runs to his side and paced with him, even if he tries to run after his lover who ran away and left him behind. He never knew this would happen. He thought he was all she ever wanted, and now she’s gone just like that. “Was I too slow? Was it something I said?” He stops, almost standing in the middle of the road, and cries to himself, “Fuck! I only did this because it’s January! She left me. I don’t want this anymore!”
But the third wheel isn’t gonna let that happen. She knew they’ve ran too far already just to stop right here. She won’t just let all of their efforts to end like that, clueless and hopeless. With the little skills she learned from her karate class in college, she strikes a strong leg kick as strong as a black coffee would give your chest a scary palpitation in the morning, and hits the guy on his butt. He almost shits his jersey shorts but was able to hold it in after using every bit of strength his ass muscles had left.
Then, despite trying to catch her breath from all the running, the third wheel shouts at the guy, “Get it together, ya pussy! I only agreed to run with you because you promised you’d treat us to McDonald’s afterwards. I better have my double cheeseburger or that shit you held in is gonna go up your throat!” They arrived at McDonald’s and found his girlfriend, who probably dropped at least a couple calories after a five-minute fast-walk and ten seconds sprint, eating her quarter-pounder with large fries and coke like she’s never had a serious meal in ages.